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职场英语:为什么同事都不喜欢你

[日期:10-09] 来源:网络  作者:未知 [字体: ]

职场英语:为什么同事都不喜欢你

 

 

 

  Why Co-Workers Don't Like You

  Your co-workers are judging you. Beneath a veneer of professional collegiality, they're taking note of the mess on your desk, how loudly you chew, even your word choices.

  

  Obviously, serious misconduct such as discrimination and harassment can lead to a job loss. But small irritants can hurt productivity and build walls between co-workers.

  

  'Those little annoyances, like having a really sloppy work area or being a disgusting desk eater, can loom large,' says Charles Purdy, senior editor at jobs site Monster.com.

  

  To avoid negative judgments from your co-workers, experts advise avoiding the following behaviors.

  

  1. Sucking up to the boss

  

  The boss's pet who ingratiates himself at the expense of his co-workers incites negative judgments, says Meredith Haberfeld, a New York-based executive and career coach.

  

  For example, Ms. Haberfeld consulted for a human-resources company where a junior employee pointed out his co-workers' mistakes after errors had been made.

  

  'He created ill will with his colleagues because he didn't ever go to them to provide any insights while he saw the ship sinking,' Ms. Haberfeld says. 'Nobody wanted to work with him.'

  

  Trying to take work from your colleagues, or take too much credit, are also bad moves.

  

  'These people are seen as overly self-interested and therefore untrustworthy and difficult to work with,' Ms. Haberfeld says. 'At a certain point, to go further in your career you need to not just be liked by your boss, you need support from your peers and people more junior.'

  

  2. Negativity

  

  The occasional bit of gossip can relieve stress. Too much can make you look bad.

  

  'Sometimes it's fun to talk about the boss, but the person who is always complaining is widely disliked as well,' Mr. Purdy says. 'Toxic negativity makes people feel like you are not a good co-worker. People associate negativity with you.'

  

  According to a 2011 Monster.com survey, respondents reported that among their co-workers' impolite behaviors, gossiping 'ticked them off,' along with texting during meetings, being too loud and leaving a mess.

  

  Employees also are judged when they interrupt colleagues, or ignore or discount others' ideas, says Peter Post, author and great-grandson of etiquette expert Emily Post.

  

  'Those are the kinds of things that people remember for a long time. You are really attacking the person and belittling them,' Mr. Post says. 'They see you as a bully, and don't want to interact with you.'

  

  Complaining about 'inappropriate' behavior that is, at worst, slightly off is also a problem. 'It feels really condescending,' says Art Papas, founder of TheFit.com, a website where workers complete anonymous surveys about companies' cultures. 'Just because you're offended that doesn't mean you have to broadcast it.'

  

  3. Messiness

  

  Messiness, particularly in communal areas and shared workspaces, can breed negative judgments.

  

  'Food that's left to become some sort of other thing in the refrigerator is really frustrating,' says Mr. Post.

  

  According to a recent survey from staffing and consulting firm Adecco, a majority of respondents said people are most productive when their workspace is clean, though some view messiness as a sign of being busy, and others see it as an indication of laziness.

  

  4. Poor cubicle etiquette

  

  In offices with few doors and lots of cubicles, etiquette with regard to odors and noise is important.

  

  Microwaving last night's fish dinner for lunch in your cubicle today is a no-no. And your co-workers can sense if you didn't clean up after bicycling to the office.

  

  But a loud talker may be the top offender. 'If you need to concentrate and somebody is yapping, it can affect your work,' says Margaret Fiester, operations manager for the human-resources knowledge center at the Society for Human Resource Management.

  

  5. Not fitting in

  

  It's important to fit into an office culture. That can include how you dress, and what you say.

  

  'I was in a meeting the other day and somebody dropped the S-bomb. The third time they did it, it became unprofessional,' Mr. Papas says.

  

  There's also a code of conduct for email. 'Maybe someone is overly brusque, or is always putting urgent or cc'ing everything,' Mr. Purdy says. 'Bcc is almost always a dangerous idea.

  

  'Transparency is important─it prevents you from seeming sneaky. If you are bcc'ing someone to get someone else in trouble, you are being the office jerk.'

  

  同事们会对你评头论足。在团队协作的面纱之下,你乱糟糟的办公桌、你咀嚼时的声音之大、甚至你的措辞都会被同事们记在心里。

  

  Chip Wass显然,歧视和骚扰等严重的不当行为会导致你被解雇。但一些小问题也会影响工作效率,还会在你和同事之间筑起高墙。

  

  招聘网站Monster.com的高级编辑查尔斯?珀迪(Charles Purdy)说,“这些让人讨厌的小事情都可能会成为大问题,比如工作区邋遢不堪,或者在办公桌上吃相恶心。”

  

  为防止同事对你做出负面评价,专家建议避免以下行为。

  

  1. 巴结老板

  

  纽约的高管和职业培训师梅雷迪思?哈伯费尔德(Meredith Haberfeld)说,为博取老板欢心而不惜牺牲同事利益的人会招致不满。

  

  比方说,哈伯费尔德曾为一家人力资源公司做过咨询,该公司有一名资历较浅的雇员会在同事犯错之后指出他们的错误。

  

  哈伯费尔德说,“他这种做法让他和同事之间产生了矛盾,因为他看到船下沉的时候总是袖手旁观。谁也不想和他一起工作。”

  

  把同事的工作揽过来自己做,或者把太多功劳归到自己名下也是不好的做法。

  

  哈伯费尔德说,“这些人在同事看来是过于自私,因此不值得信赖,也很难共事。从某种意义上来说,要想在事业上有进一步发展,你不仅要赢得老板赏识,也需要获得与你资历相当以及比你资历浅的同事的支持。”

  

  2. 消极抱怨

  

  偶尔八卦一下可以缓解压力。但说太多闲话则会给人留下不好的印象。

  

  珀迪说,“有时候八卦一下老板很好玩,但总发牢骚也会引起周围人的厌恶。消极抱怨会让人感觉你不是个好同事。人们会对你持否定态度。”

  

  Monster.com 2011年的一项调查显示,受访者认为在同事的不礼貌行为中,说闲话、开会时发短信、说话太大声和留下一堆烂摊子都“令人恼火”。

  

  礼仪专家埃米莉?波斯特(Emily Post)的重孙、作家彼得?波斯特(Peter Post)说,如果在同事说话时插嘴,忽视或者轻视其他人的看法,也会被同事挑刺。

  

  波斯特说,“这些事情别人会惦记很长时间。你这样做真的是在打击和贬低别人,他们会觉得你盛气凌人,不想跟你来往。”

  

  为顶多算是略显不妥的“失当”行为大发牢骚也是一个问题。职业咨询网站TheFit.com的创始人阿特?帕帕斯(Art Papas)说,“这种行为真的给人一种居高临下的感觉,不是说你受到冒犯就应该搞得众人皆知。”职场人士可以在TheFit.com上填写有关公司文化的匿名调查问卷。

  

  3. 邋遢

  

  邋遢(尤其是在公共区域和与别人共用的办公区域)可能会引起同事的负面评价。

  

  波斯特说,“把吃的东西放在冰箱里变质真的让人很不爽。”

  

  招聘和咨询公司Adecco近期的一项调查显示,大多数受访者称,在整洁的工作环境中人们的工作效率最高。尽管有些人把杂乱视为工作忙碌的标志,但其他人会认为杂乱意味着懒惰。

  

  4. 不注意“隔间礼仪”

  

  在门很少、隔间很多的办公室里,避免异味和噪音是很重要的。

  

  千万不要在你的隔间里用微波炉热前一天晚上做的鱼。还有,如果你骑自行车到办公室之后不把自己收拾干净,你的同事们也能觉察得到。

  

  不过头号大忌也许是说话声音太大。美国人力资源管理学会(Society for Human Resource Management)人力资源知识中心的营运经理玛格丽特?菲斯特(Margaret Fiester)说,“如果你需要集中注意力,但有人却在叽里呱啦说个不停,这就会影响你的工作。”

  

  5. 与办公室文化格格不入

  

  融入办公室的文化是很重要的。办公室文化中包括你的着装和说话方式。

  

  帕帕斯说,“前几天我开会的时候有人骂了句脏话。他们第三次说脏话的时候,就显得很不专业了。”

  

  发电子邮件也是有规矩的。珀迪说,“有的人可能过于生硬唐突,或者总是在电子邮件上标注紧急,或者什么都抄送。而密送在多数情况下都是一种危险的想法。”

  

  他说,“公开透明很重要──让你不至于显得鬼鬼祟祟的。如果你为了打某位同事的小报告而把邮件密送给某人,你就成了办公室里的混蛋。”

 

 

 

 

 

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